Christopher Michael (Joseph) Robertson

THIS MEMORIAL WEB SITE HAS BEEN CREATED ~
IN LOVING MEMORY OF CHRISTOPHER MICHAEL "JOSEPH" ROBERTSON
AND IS OPEN TO ALL WHO KNEW AND LOVED HIM.

PLEASE DROP IN ANYTIME TO LIGHT A CANDLE FOR CHRIS OR TO VIEW HIS PHOTOS ~
YOU'RE WELCOME TO PUT UP ANY PHOTOS THAT YOU HAVE OR TO LEAVE A TRIBUTE ~
DIFFERENT SONGS WILL BE CYCLED FROM CHRIS' COLLECTION ~
AND NEW PHOTOS WILL BE ADDED ~
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♫This Song Selection features RADIOHEAD from the Album "OK COMPUTER" ♫ One of his favorite Rock
Groups of all time! ♫
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Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ☆ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ☆ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Chris, I cherish the days we spent together and all the memories we had ~ I will keep them forever!!
Mom
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Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ☆ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ☆ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

THANK YOU!! EVERYONE!!! SO VERY MUCH!!!
FOR REMEMBERING MY ONLY SON, CHRIS "JOE"!!!

ALL MY LOVE ~ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ VICKI ~ CHRIS' MOM ~
HONORED CHRIS IS MY SON ~
HUMBLED GOD CHOSE 'ME' TO BE HIS MOTHER

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ☆ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ☆ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ
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Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ☆ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ☆ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

MY DEAR SWEET CHRIS "JOE" ~ I MISS YOU SO MUCH!
THANKS FOR SENDING THE WHITE BUTTERFLIES FROM HEAVEN!!

ALL MY LOVE FOREVER Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ MOM

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ☆ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ☆Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ
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CHRIS WROTE THIS BEFORE HE LEFT, IT WAS READ AT HIS FUNERAL.~ MY SPECIAL PLACE
THERE'S NO TUNE TO THIS SONG, JUST WORDS AND RHYTHM.
THE MUSIC YOU HEAR WILL ONLY COME FROM THE BEAT OF YOUR HEART. IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL HERE. I'VE FINALLY
FOUND A SPOT TO THINK. THE RIVER IS CLEAR AND THE MOON IS BEAUTIFUL. I FEEL ALMOST AS IF GOD HIMSELF
MADE THIS SPOT FOR ME.
CHRIS "JOE"

.........❀✿❀✿............❀✿❀✿
....❀✿........❀✿......❀✿….......❀✿
.❀✿...............❀✿❀✿..............❀✿
..❀✿.................❀✿.................❀✿
...❀✿.......Heart Of Flowers....❀✿
......❀✿...........For You..........❀✿
.........❀✿.......Chris “Joe”.....❀✿
.............❀✿.....................❀✿
.................❀✿………......❀✿
.....................❀✿......❀✿
.........................❀❀✿
.......FROM MOM...❀...WITH LOVE
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Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ☆ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ☆ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ WHAT HAPPENED ~

Nine days before Christmas 2006, my beautiful, 21-year-old son, Chris (who also went by “Joe”)
was involved in a single vehicle fatality. He was a supervisor at a discount supercenter. He was
engaged, in college and was my only child. His stepfather and I were looking forward to college
graduation, a wedding in the future and the possibility of grand-kids.

But, all that changed early on the morning of December 16, 2006. These are the events that
transpired that day, in which forever scarred my soul, re-play over and over in my mind and are the
subject of my nightmares.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ THE ACCIDENT ~

Chris had been working early morning extended “Holiday Hours” for the Christmas Shopping Season,
and was on his way to see his fiancé before work, when around 4:00 - 4:30 am, between 101st & 111th
(Lynn Lane) at the intersection of 9th and Waco, the roads were slick and he lost control of his
vehicle. (He was going slightly faster than he should have been).

Traveling north at 60 mph, his car skid just feet before the bridge, veered left, and the rear of
the car hit the guardrail so hard that his head hit the driver’s side window, and busted the glass
completely out!!!

It is believed that the blunt force trauma to the head knocked him immediately unconscious, so he
did not suffer. The car continued off the road, hit a drainage ditch, bounced on the rear, flipped
right and became airborne. It clipped some trees, and ended up against the far side of the ravine.
It was real muddy and the car, now upside down, slipped slowly down into the water.

Because it happened so early in the morning on a Saturday, he was not found for 6 hours, even though
there were houses all around!!! A neighbor noticed his car in the creek around 10:00 am that
morning, as he was getting his newspaper and immediately called 911.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ CAUSE OF DEATH ~

The medical examiner determined that Christopher had suffered blunt force trauma to the head, a
broken back, two broken legs, and then . . . . he drown!!! The police said when they found him, he
was still strapped in his seatbelt, the car’s head lights were on. And there was no alcohol in his
system.

The traffic officers worked the scene for three hours, getting my son out of the car, and getting
the car out of the creek and cleaned up the wreck site at which time they proceeded to our house to
tell us what I just told you.

Channel 6 News was at the crash site. The wreck footage aired several times that day, so the image
of my son being stuck in his car, upside down, alone, in the water for hours replays in my memory
forever.

Click on Photos, under Chris' name at the very top, upper right grey window. *Attention* (Wreck
photos are on the next to the last page, for those who do not wish to see them).

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ WHERE WAS I ~

I had just returned from shopping for his beautiful fiancé’s Christmas gift. I did not know at
the time, that Chris was already gone, and had been for hours. I chose white gold Swarskosky
crystal heart-shaped earrings representing my son’s new love. I never got the chance to share one
last Christmas with him or to give his fiancé her presents. But I’m glad that, about twelve days
before Christmas, my son had stopped by as he often did, and he was so happy because he was in love!


He ran straight upstairs because he knew that’s where I wrapped presents. I wish I had given him
the gifts, then. But at least, I was able to read to him the card I had written to his fiancé. It
said, ”If the love of my life loves you, then you must be special.” So at the time my son
passed, he knew that, at least to me, he was the love of my life. I thank God for that every day.

I checked out of the store at 10:02 am and at 10:13 am, Chris was found. At approximately 1:00 pm
that day, I was wrapping presents, when Sgt. Ed Ferguson, and the department’s chaplain parked
their police car in front of our house and began walking up the lawn. I saw the demeanor on their
faces, so I knew something was horribly wrong.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ GETTING BAD NEWS ~

Rick answered the door and I ran to the bedroom to put on my robe. I was getting ready to come out,
when Rick slowly opened the door and said in a low and very serious tone, in which I had never heard
before. “Hun, the police are here and they want to speak to the parents of Christopher
Robertson.”

They met me at the end of the hallway and said, “Your son, Chris. . . . has been in an accident. .
. . and it was fatal.” I thought, ‘What!?!?’ When I heard the word ‘accident’, I quickly
forwarded to ~ he must be in the hospital. So I asked, “When can I see him?”

The officer, intimidating in his uniform, with his gun in his holster, and all these gadgets on his
belt repeated his message, slowly, but more firmly, as if he was angry that I had made him speak
those horrible words, again.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ WORDS NO MOTHER SHOULD EVER HEAR ~

My heart became heavy and began to pound rapidly. I couldn’t breathe, there was a knot in my
throat, my heart sank to the depths of my soul, and I thought, ‘What is this man telling me and
why does he mention my son’s name like he knows him personally?’

I cried out, “It was fatal?” “Are you sure?” Then I proceeded to describe my son, ‘tall,
skinny . . .’ hoping surely they had made a mistake. The policemen just continued to shake their
heads slowly, “No, we’re sure,” they insisted. Then the most horrifying thoughts came into my
head, my heart sank and I asked, "was anyone with him?” “No.”

“Good,” and my heart leaped momentarily, but quickly my thoughts raced back to my son, and I
repeated my question in horror and disbelief, “It was fatal!?!!” Then I grabbed the
officer’s shirt with both hands and began beating him on the chest, repeating, “No, No, this is
not happening, this is not happening!” Then I started pacing the floor frantically with a tissue,
crying, shaking my head saying, “No, No, this is NOT OK!" My anger increased, as I continued to
repeat that phrase. I just wanted to scream!

When I finally calmed down, we sat down in the living room, the Chaplain began answering my
questions, and telling me what had happened that night/early morning in more detail.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ INFORMING THE FAMILY ~

After the police told me what happened, they asked me for Chris’ Dad’s phone number. My first
thought was, ‘why are you asking ME about HIM?’ I knew he was in real estate, but hadn't spoke
to him in years. I couldn’t find any information, so I got on the internet and looked him up. I
printed his information for the police, and they left to go inform the other side of the family.

We began making calls, as well. The first person I tried to call was my Mom, but they were on
vacation several hours away and had their cell off!!! I panicked when I couldn’t reach my
parents! I thought, ‘If I could just reach my Mom, everything would be OK’.

So we called my brother, he always knows where they are. Luckily, he was in town, and was able to
reach us within thirty minutes. The next person I called was my best friend. She and her family
dropped everything and were able to get here within an hour and a half. Then, I called my sister
and I will never forget the heart-wrenching moan she cried out when she realized her nephew was
gone.

After my brother had tracked down my parents, all we could do was leave a message and wait. It
seemed like an ETERNITY waiting for my parents! After they received the message, they got stuck in
Holiday Traffic in Branson! When they finally arrived and I saw my Mom, I collapsed emotionally and
went into some sort of shock and I barely remember the events that happened after that.

I remember Chris’ Dad called me on my cell, but his voice sounded so much like my son’s on the
phone, I gave the phone to my Mom and was not able to talk to him.

After the police left, I wailed and wailed for my son for hours. These crying spells would go on for
days on end, every day for years. All I wanted was to hold my son just one more time, but they
refused to let me see him. I just wanted to rock him and hold him one last time!

For some reason, I just could not comprehend that my child, my only son, was not here anymore. To
my demise, that understanding would not come for years.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ SPIRALING DOWN ~

Almost immediately, a flurry of people began crowding into my house, which is not that big. My
whole world was closing in around me. My head was spinning, I was spiraling down, and things were
going way too fast! I needed the time to slow down. I needed it to go backwards! I thought, ‘If
I could only go back, it’s not too late, I can fix this.’ However, time seemed to increase in
speed, instead.

Everyone was asking me questions like, “What funeral home do you want, what kind of flowers?"
“What clothes are you going to choose for him?” “Will he be wearing shoes?” I was
thinking, ‘What kind of question is that?’

People began ordering things, some I picked, and some I didn’t. I was choosing things that I
didn’t want to buy, yet I did want to buy the best I could for my son.

I called my doctor, because I am under his care for Fibromyalgia and was given a prescription. After
that, I truly don’t remember much, including the funeral and days after. (I didn’t know my
sister was even present until I saw the photos later and she and her family filled the whole pew,
and were sitting right behind me)! I could only see a little in front me, but everything else was
black.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ PLANNING A FUNERAL ~

Before I knew it, that same day that earlier I had been Christmas shopping, I was now sitting at a
table in a funeral home with my son’s Dad and his Stepfather, making arrangements for a ceremony
in which I did not want.

Songs for the religious service were chosen, the date, time, the casket, the plots, and the marker
were chosen and paid for by the three of us, (Christopher’s parents), and the Grandparents on
both sides. It was decided to have his marker say, “Christopher M. “Joseph” Robertson ~
Loving Son.”

The funeral director asked me if I wanted Chris’ clothes, and I said yes. He returned with a
black plastic bag and we all went home in a daze, not quite comprehending all the events that had
just transpired that day, but hoping and praying that it was all just a horrible nightmare.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ TRYING TO FIX IT ~

The first thing I did when I got home was to open the bag. At the top were two muddy rubber gloves
in which I threw in the trash. I proceeded to load the dirty, wet, muddy clothes into the washer.
His shirt was ripped in half, his jeans were cut off of him, and there was only one shoe. The
clothes were so muddy, I guess I didn’t notice what I was about to see next.

As the water began to cycle through the machine, the water ran pink! All I thought was ‘where is
all this red coming from?’ And then to my horror, I realized what was happening. I washed the
clothes on the hot/heavy setting twice, then dried, and folded them and put them with his other
things. All I wanted was to clean this mess up and put all the pieces back together again.

There were a few things recovered from his car that were wet and muddy. We laid the items on the
table to dry and cleaned them up, as well. The cleaning, tending, and decorating ritual continues
at the cemetery, for each special occasion (as if he were still here) but now – he is not here
for.

My doctor said the first two years were the worst, so I had pinned some sort of hope on getting past
that date, only to be disappointed to learn that I feel worse! I finally realized there were many
grieving friends and relatives, but only one Grieving Mother, or (one who grieves like a Mother).

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ALL ALONE IN MY GRIEF ~

No one, not even my own Husband or Mom, could relate. Because God chose me to be Chris’ Mom, the
greatest honor, I would also have to be the one that took the greatest brunt of the grief. Because
Christopher and all Children are a Gift From God, the Loss was incredibly GREAT!

The “Sheaves of Wheat” on Christopher’s stone represents the “LOVE THAT A MOTHER BARES FOR
HER SON,” and to Christopher’s family, that GOD IS OUR DAILY BREAD.

TO THIS DAY, I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT HE IS TRULY GONE!
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Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ GRIEVING THE DEATH OF A GROWN SON ~

You hovered over the crib, watching the rise and fall of your precious child's chest as he slept,
making sure he was OK. You held your breath the first time he took a step. You cringed when you
witnessed a little bump or bruise. If he were in love, you worried he would get hurt!

But finally, he turned 21 and you breathed a sigh of relief because you thought your son had reached
adulthood safely, and you were proud of the wonderful young man he had become.

Then, the unthinkable happens, a traffic accident and the son you nurtured through childhood is
gone!!! It happened so fast, you didn't get to say good bye!

Grown up kids are a special delight. Almost overnight, they turn from defiant teens into responsible
adults. They leave home, get jobs, go away to school and start families of their own. Your
relationship changes, and you become friends.

Then THEY become parents and finally understand what it is like. Some go on to bless you with their
own children, and you become GRAND!!!

Death shatters that relationship. This time your son is really gone and so is what was supposed to
live on after your death. You invested much of your time, your finances, your heart, and your life
to this person, through good times and bad!! And now, all that is gone.

It is un-natural to have to bury your own children. But most importantly, because children are a
GIFT FROM GOD, losing ONE is a LOSS OF BIBLICAL PROPORTIONS!!! And that HURTS!!! VERY, VERY MUCH!!

♥ ~ ♥ ~ ♥ ~ ♥ ~ ♥ ~ ♥

When Chris was here, I always felt a part of his soul inside mine. Now that God has his soul, I
don't feel that anymore. Perhaps that is why I feel so empty?! A part of me died that day. I know
I will never be the same. And that is what is so hard to accept.
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♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ ABOUT ME ? ♥ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥

Scroll back up, click on my name to see my garden. You can read about my "Grand-Puppy" and "The
Butterfly Tree," Love and Peace to you,
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ Vicki - Christopher's Broken-hearted Mother

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Butterfly